what makes a hero be a hero?

What makes a hero be a hero?



In the land of Hyule, the wind whispers a legend about a boy…
… a boy that faced terrible darkness, solved the most tricky dungeons…
… and in the end, the boy… no, the hero, saved the day.


But a day came when the boy was called,
by a mysterious wizard, known and feared as the terrible Knuzzle.
“What a pathetic name” the hero said,
“What a pathetic hero” the wizard mumbled.


“What is it that brought you here?” the wizard asked,
“I thought it was you” the hero answered,
“Indeed, it was me” the wizard added ashamed,
“It’s just that my memory has some flaws, smart boy”


“Enough!” the hero yelled at the wizard,
“Just tell me what you want from me!”
“To finish you if you lose, stare in wonder if you don’t” the wizard yelled back…
… “you didn’t have to yell” the hero said then.


For the hero had figured out the way to kill every fiend,
To hit this from the giant beast,
To blow that from the fierce monster,
There was always an answer,
No matter the size, the fire or the many limbs of an enemy.


“But now, Mr. Hero, I have a test for you so you can be called a true figure-stuff-outer”
“But I don’t want to be called that” the hero said.
“Well, I don’t care, just hear me out!” the wizard said back…


“… Far in the lake, you will face your first test,
Go then and come back with proof of you success.”
“And what if I don’t” The hero said then.
“You know, I’m evil and that, so I kinda kidnapped princess Zelda”
“You bastard!” The hero said before leaving.


Far in the lake the hero saw a group of people,
And the group of people saw the hero.
But from among the people, a girl came closer holding a crystal sword,


And the girl said:
“Behold the crystal sword,
You must face me in front of this people,
Who cannot see my weapon.
If you fight back they will see you as a coward forever,
The coward that fought the girl with no weapon”
And the hero said then:
“So you’re one of Knuzzle’s servants”
And the hero giggled a little at the sole mention of such name.
Then the girl said to the hero:
“This fight is not to be seen if you want to keep you honor,
In the eyes of those who admire you,
So let us see if that bottomless bag carries the right item…
… now defeat me, hero! defeat Espectra!”


Te hero then dodged an invisible sword,
As the people started clapping their hands,
For they thought it was a dance between the boy and the girl.
It was a tiresome dance, indeed,
And then the hero reached for his bag,
Looking for something that could bring an end to this fight.


And so the hero brought something out,
And it was everything he was carrying,
And then, with the empty dodongo bag in his hands
He trapped the sword and claimed it as his own.


“You won this one, hero, you’re wise, I can see that”


Then the hero came back to Knuzzle’s lair,
And showed the crystal sword to the wizard.
The wizard said then “I don’t see anything”.
The hero stared at him confused and angry…
… and then the wizard said “I’m just kidding, you did well”


After being slapped by the hero, the wizard revealed the second test:
“Deep in the forest you will find your next test,
Look for the twins with the eyes fired in rage”


And the hero went to the forest,
And then he saw a skull kid,
And in the weirdest of the moments
Saria was dancing with him.


“What are you staring at, is not like we are lovers” Saria replied to the hero.
“So… we are not?” the skull kid said.
Ant then the skull kid ran away covered in tears.
“Oh, great! See what you have done?” Saria said.
“Is not like I broke his heart… and now that I remember…
… I was in the middle of a quest, why did I even stop here?”
The hero said before leaving.


Then the hero found the twins near a waterfall,
And when they saw him they smiled:
“You will fall into darkness, for we cannot be defeated yet”
The twins said with ghostly voices.
“That’s what they all say” The hero answered.


And the twins said then:
“Each one of us has two swords, so we have four, and you have one,
If there is a doubt in your heart that you can actually win this battle,
As we said, you’re most likely to fall into darkness…
…for there is no warrior we know that has no fear…
… and fear brings you doubt…
… and doubt brings you death.”


So the twins screamed in anger and charged,
But the hero feared not,
For he knew already, that the moments he has feared…
… Are the moments he has lost.


And in the end, with all of his courage,
The hero shattered the swords of the twins…
… And then he thought “What am I supposed to take as a proof?”
The twins stared at each other
And then they gave the hero a letter to deliver.


“You are courageous, hero… but we will come back and hunt ya!”


The hero then delivered the letter to Knuzzle:
“The hero, like, shattered our swords,
So we sent you this letter as a proof.
Love, Geminie”


And the wizard smiled then…
… “I just love those two… especially that girl, I mean…
… ah, wait, where was I?”


And so the wizard set the final test:
“Up in the mountain, look for the hammer,
If you bring proof of your victory I will stare at you in wonder”


And the hero said then:
“Stare all you want… but what about Zelda?”


And the wizard answered:
“Ah, ok, I forgot, I will release the princess,
You know, vanish into darkness, curse you and stuff”


Then the hero went to the mountain,
And he saw a goron rolling its way down,
And he tried to stop him with a bomb to ask him about the hammer…
… and BOOM!! The bomb stopped the goron…
… and also blew it away in pieces.


And the hero ran as fast as he could,
And suddenly, he found a big sign:
“The Hammer smith”


The hero entered the house and looked for the smith,
And the smith saw the hero…
“Knuzzle has sent you, I’m aware,
And as his main soldier I will show you just how weak you are!”


And the smith took his hammer in hand,
A hammer even bigger than the hero,
And then the smith said:
“Knuzzle! That name still sounds a little funny”
And giggled a little…
… “Behold the mighty hammer of Hierro!”


And the hero started a battle against Hierro,
A battle he was losing.
For Hierro’s strength had no rival.


After tearing the whole business apart,
The hero stopped and said:
“Your body is strong…
… but my heart is stronger”


And before Hierro could say “don’t say corny things”,
The hero delivered the final blow,
A sword strike stronger than any other that broke the very hammer.


“You are powerful, yes, you are… but your biceps don’t compare to mine”


And so the hero went back to Knuzzle’s lair,
And showed the broken hammer.


“Yes, you have succeeded in all three tests,
So here I go…”
And Knuzzle stared in wonder with the creepiest eyes the hero had seen.


And then the hero said:
“Please stop that, it’s creepy…
… just let Zelda go”


Then Knuzzle let Zelda go, and she joined the hero,
But before leaving, they asked something important:
“Why, Knuzzle? What was in all of this for you?”


And then Knuzzle answered:
“I was teaching you and my soldiers an important lesson…
… One can only be a hero, if he has power, wisdom and courage…
… Don’t ever seek the triforce,
For you have it in you already”


As the hero and Zelda left,
Knuzzle was making noises and running in circles,
Screaming and pretending “he was vanishing into darkness and stuff”

-End-

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